Soulmates&Swingers #Podcast with Demi Wylde PT 3

0:07 It's the sex and lifestyle podcast that you didn't know you needed. This is the Swinging Soul Mates Podcast with your host, Mondo and sativa. Please relax, unwind and come play with us and our guest cohost as we candidly share our personal experiences and erotic escapades in the lifestyle motivated by passion and purpose. Our goal is to create a community that allows themselves to be educated and entertained through the tales of the swimming zones. Mondo and Sativa are not medical professionals, yet we are a happily married couple of 19 years, and in the LLS for 10 we have a deep, unwavering commitment to our marriage and to holding a space in normalizing and redefining the concept of relationships and monogamy.

1:02 The Swinging Soul Mates strives to be a resource and inspiration to others. So subscribe, put a reoccurring play date on your calendar, and come along with us as we journey deep into our lives as swinging soul mates.

1:26 Yeah, yeah. Yeah. What ended up happening with the guy with the book? Yeah. So nothing. Unfortunately they didn't end up winning the case, but they had to do a lot of like interpersonal work with themselves in order to like kind of heal in the relationship. Like that happened within the first couple of weeks of their of their. How they're dating, you know now they're married and but you know there were times when you know she would they would be they would actually be having sex and she would have you know a PTSD flashback or.

2:04 Something and. And so they would have to like navigate that that thing when they didn't really have that experience either. So there's a lot. To For him, that's hard. And for him to for. Both. But it takes a. Lot of emotional intelligence in order. To Yes, yes, very much so. And so much love and respect for her to be that understanding. It takes a lot. I mean, as a human, nobody, I think would hold it against him if he slipped and he looked elsewhere for affection and for love, because that's such a stressful situation to be in.

2:42 But the fact that he was able to. You know, to not not go against it, but to be strong enough, you know, and like you said that emotional intelligence. I just, I give it to him. I mean all kind of snaps and claps and love and light to him and to her as well. It's very inspirational that they are still together. So the rest of y'all that get mad because of a TikTok challenge or whatever it is that got you an argument and now you want to get divorced? Shut the hell up like. You saw he, he Dm's somebody or like whatever it's like, right?

3:21 Right. Get to the bottom of it, don't make any. Records or something you know. He's like compare. Compare what you go through in a situation like that. How often? Does your podcast air? Twice a week. I have a mini episode on Tuesdays, so I basically give you like kind of sex news. So that's like the mini episode. And then I do the full episode with guests on Fridays. So what's some sex news? What's the sex news for? The Well, I covered that Maverick story on a on. A past episode. I did. I do all kinds of things.

4:00 I mean, I have Stormy Daniels, the Story with Stormy Daniels and Trump on this episode. So bad. I hate how they only refer to her as a porn star in the media. She is my hero. I just released a new shirt. I do a little bit of like art on the side, so I made this the Stormy Daniels thing. So I made it a T-shirt that says Make America gape again with Stormy Daniels with an American flag behind. You can get that on my website. Please send me a link, but you let me know where I can get. That's awesome.

4:30 Yeah, that's in my shop right now. Yes, Well, so she's. My hero. I fucking love her. I love her too. I love that she's like, fuck it. So what if I signed a little shitty piece of paper that says what you know? I love. I just wish she would have got paid more. You. Know that's first of all, girl, you should have got at least a million for even seeing that man naked and having him touch you, when I should have been a million anyway. And then to keep you hush hush should have been at least another meal.

5:03 Like, first of all, I don't want anybody to know either. So right. Exactly. I give it to her, but I just hate how the media. Porn star, Porn star, Porn star like. There's more to her than that. Right, right, Like or even use her real name, like don't. Isn't she an author, too? She's an author. She's a producer. Like she's She's got. She's got. And and no, no shade to her at all. But I would say a porn star would be somebody who's on the front of Pornhub's front page right now. She's not. That's not even hurt for Deal anymore, so stop calling her that it.

5:43 Every time. And I don't watch the news a lot. I watch snippets. Thank God for you too. But they are not going to. The news is not the media is not going to infiltrate my life and make me as miserable as as they are. But I just especially around the indictment and everything. All you hear is just her referred to as that instead of just saying Stormy Daniels. If you have to give her that, you know that moniker. And that's just bullshit. I mean, they should be like brave woman who touched that wrinkly old saggy balls, like you know.

6:20 She is a patriot. Right, because you know, that is probably the ugliest penis. I don't think penises are ugly like. She described. But that's probably ugly. She said it. The tiny mushroom. Oh, God would have been so high. I would have been like Trump, get me the best of the best like for this to happen. But no. So I I think that. That is, that's a good news topic. Do you ever cover, you know, there's this, I don't want to say push back, but there's this, this little bit of movement that I'm seeing in women not wanting or stopping and using vibrators and and you know, dildos and things like that.

7:01 There's a small movement of women that are saying, like, I need to stop using that because I'm desensitizing myself or you know? I'm I don't see a need for a man because of that. Have you come across that? Have you noticed that, that narrative that's kind of out there? Do you talk about the many, many benefits of self love or, you know, introducing toys and tools and things into a relationship? Well, I can't say I've seen a narrative of this, but I can see how some people might. Get too much of a good thing, you know, I think I'm a kind of person that subscribes to everything in moderation.

7:46 If you're constantly like jamming that thing on on you and you're you don't need, you don't need no man. You don't need nothing else. Like, I'm just going to be in this room for four hours just licking the bean. You know it's. The bean. I haven't heard that in a while. I love it. I love that term, you know. And there could be too much of of that going on where it's like okay I don't need nothing. You know. And that might be a little bit perhaps toxic just in the realm of like you know getting out there or you know meeting other people or you know it's like I I can see how that there's a borderline there.

8:27 I I can't think I've really seen a narrative though unfortunately. I mean, is this a is this a common thing that you women are just like I'm, I'm just. I'm I'm up in there all the time and I don't need. That yeah, I'm going to say Twitter is probably, well, I always say Facebook is just so toxic. If I see one more Judge Mathis case that has to do with because they said this on Facebook, I'm going to lose it. So Facebook is toxic in under the way, but Twitter is definitely that way, and I've seen it more on Twitter than any anywhere else.

9:02 Well, Twitter's only two places that you can get sex content. Well, any any. I don't like if somebody good thing my 14 year old doesn't. He just he cannot stand. He thinks that China is trying to dumb America down through all social media. So he doesn't have any, which I love. But if I ever was curious about what he was watching, sometimes when he's in his bedroom or bathroom, I'd be like Twitter. Because you can pull up Twitter and see all of the good stuff. You don't have to have a Pornhub account or anything else.

9:38 Like, it's right there. So yeah, on that you can find anything. Twitter's like how Google was when Google first came out. You found all the bad shit, like no matter what. So yeah, it it's a, like I said, it's small. It's a small, you know, movement. But I have seen that and I'm just kind of like. I'm sorry that you guys don't have a good opportunity for moderation or for balance, because sometimes they just top off the event very nice. You can be physical with your man, or you're a woman or whoever else, and then you just use that toy and it just takes you right there and then you sleep well.

10:23 That kind of goes back to how they keep calming. Stormy Daniels pornstar. They rather.

10:32 Make it look bad or something that you should keep behind. She's a business owner. She's an entrepreneur like. Everybody see the video. It's like even though the people that are prosecutor watch her and I say she's a porn star. Well, now that makes it seem a little bit worse when like this, really part of everyday life for adults is something in most situations. I think there's very few people that aren't coming across some type of adult or sexual thought or sexual something. Throughout Well, there's a reason why sex work is the world's oldest profession.

11:14 Like sex work is work it's just never been socially acceptable for. Yes. And so speaking to that, I was gonna ask, I have two questions. So during COVID, I'd say. You know, right before COVID, during COVID, we saw just a boom and and in sexual the whole sex workers. Yes. So how do you navigate with that, with your advocacy? Because there has been a conversation, especially with Pornhub recently, that, you know, the Danielle Berlo Bexoli or Bexoli, Catch me outside, girl. How when she turned 18 she made millions of dollars in like 1 day and her only fans.

12:01 But how do you narrate or navigate through that when it comes to you know sex trafficking and and girls that are not 18 years old, even some that are. Because I I believe I saw a statistic that said that a lot of that the age is between 15 and I want to say 2122 for girls that are. That are being traffic generally, how do you, like I said, how do you navigate with that? Because like I said, there has been instances where you can pull up a Pornhub and you're like, that is nobody's adult, that is a full child, so.

12:41 Or even the fact that now is a trend right now for the whole pedophilia type of scenes where? Yeah, step mom and. Son, yeah. That's kind of always been a thing. Yeah, not only young girl, but yeah, but the incest kind of aspect is kind of it. I mean, I was like, when are we going to take a vote that this is not the top, you know, search, you know scenes and stuff and and porn. Because it's it's been going since very heavy. I'd say since about COVID. So I think a part of that is, I know there's been a lot of conversation in the past, recent years about sex trafficking and what it is.

13:31 And there's been a lot of misinformation about it as well,

13:35 namely 2060 or 2020 when all that crazy stuff was going out that summer about it. But the real issue, what I've seen is like, you know they've taken down Backpage, they've taken, I know now Pornhub, you can't you it's all like. Premier content or whatever. So you have to like basically pay for it. There's nothing that's not studio there. There is a bit of like amateur studio, but it's still kind of like all kind of regulated, yeah. So, and there's more verification. There's more, I mean. It's going to do webcam verification.

14:10 Not all all of the sites but some of them are very staunch and they're like resolute about I don't care if you look 67 I need to see that you know that form of ID so. There has been steps taken to ensure at least verification of age. Right. So there's there's steps that are being taken in this and however, I don't think they're really addressed. The main issue of what sex trafficking is, sex trafficking is really more an issue for #1. The majority of sex trafficking incidents is from people that are close to them, close to the so their family members, partners, people that can, essentially.

14:51 Help them in some way. There are the the rare instances of, such as, you know, being abducted from The Mavericks game or something like that, but that does happen. But it's mostly people who are close to the victim. Or pretend to be friendly girl. There's always a like a house mother for lack of a better term. Right now who will recruit the girl and befriend the girl that's make some money together? My dad cleans houses or some other. You know ship so it's it's still in that same yeah it's still in that same line of somebody that knows them but.

15:28 The other part is they come from either lower class or different socioeconomic backgrounds that they might need help or they, you know, so there's kind of like this White Horse mentality with it. So basically this person comes in, says, hey, I can take you out of this, this slum, I can take you out of this situation. You know, I can give you a job. I can. I can get you money. You don't have to worry about money anymore a lot. And then there's where the kind of like, kind of grooming situation happens.

15:58 So you know it, it seems, you know, I have a person that can come and save the day, you know? Yeah. And it's that's what's what I think is most sinister about it is that we're not addressing those situations, we're addressing those, those. That's the main cause of it so. Taking down that. Cause of a lot of our problems, you know, taking down that. Page doing things up with Pornhub and doing doing that stuff, kind of like as a Band-Aid solution in my opinion. It helps, I guess, and you know it it it helps in some way, but it also makes things more difficult for more loop, more legitimate, you know, sex work.

16:37 Yeah, so I found out that Sacramento is one of the, I guess there's a loop that they kind of take the girls on. And that Sacramento is one of the main locations that they'll stop in or they'll get girls from. Yeah. So do you find or are you finding in your advocacy that it's of course in larger cities that has a huge community, that are lower income, you know, the education's low? Or is are you finding that's more prevalent?

17:13 And the reason why, I ask because I do recall a story of a very affluent, young, beautiful, blue eyed, blondhaired girl who went to a university. She got into at least the story, you know, that they're sharing. She got into using pills, gotten like being addicted to fentanyl, and then fell into with the drug dealer who ended up putting her, like, out there. And where do you, I mean, I know you already said that, you know it's all they affect and it's easier to because you're saving them from a bad situation.

17:52 But in your advocacy, what are you finding? Is there like an even amount of situations like that or are you seeing the college girls from an influence kind of family, maybe with some drug addiction? Are you are you saying that they're becoming more prevalent? Because I. Kind of. Anyone. Those stories are becoming a little more prevalent. Right. Anyone could be really be a victim and it deal with with whatever the situation might be. It could be something as such as addiction. You know you you have people who you know the supplier needs something.

18:26 So you got to give a little to get a little you know that kind of situation. You know there's all kinds of different situations that that can good. But in reality, I think a lot of the big cities, go back to your first question, the big cities are more. Kind of like a transit place, I guess, really happening in a lot of small towns. It's really happening. Like there was just a story recently about a woman who who was she had either abducted two kids and she had been making child pornography and she's child sex trafficking.

18:58 These these children. This was in North Carolina. This is in Raleigh. Oh my. God. So it's happening a lot of like the smaller cities, the places that people really wouldn't. Suspect notice? Yeah, the other way kind of thing, yeah. So I'm not sure the statistics exactly, but it's something that I've been noticing. It's like, yeah, this stuff does happen everywhere though. It's it's world. We're not. We're not Privy to it, just ourselves. It's. But yeah, it's not been everywhere. So how did you fall into or go into the advocacy aspect to working with women's, you know, sexual rights, HIV and the sexual trafficking advocacy?

19:39 How did that come about? Well, so HIV came from my personal experience. I found that I was HIV positive in 2017 so that just from it's my personal experience and then you know I'm undetectable, now I'm. Fantastic. I mean, I'm. Healthy, I'm sending you love and like quiet quietly. You never know what to say. I meet individuals. It's kind of like meeting a veteran in a way. When you go thank you for your service and they don't really want to hear that. So you know, but yes love and like to you just but that is fantastic that medically we've been able to move so far and that it has those medications and it has that treatment.

20:22 I, well, multiple sclerosis lives with me. Not the same. But don't let me. Don't let nobody yell at me. I'm not trying to say it the same.

20:32 Yeah. Yeah. So I understand. I understand. And your story is even more powerful now because of that and your advocacy. See, people. You see why he does what he does see? But domestic violence is actually something I grew up with, so I that's always been a really important topic to me and my mom. I didn't have the greatest grow up situation. However I can't say it was a bad one so mom protected me from a lot of it but there was abuse in the in the household. There was different situation, there was drug in the household, all kinds of things.

21:09 So that's always been something that was really important to me too. And then lastly, the sex trafficking. I fell into that that was an accident. Actually, I I do some debunking videos on TikTok sometimes and. So there was this influencer who posted that she was being sex trafficked by Black and she was getting Do you remember the story? Yes, I do. Yeah, I knew she was bullshit. I knew she was. And so I went through and I made this video kind of calling her out on her bullshit and it went viral and she was even in the in the comment section like saying.

21:51 I'm just trying to get attention mobile. I'm like, no, I'm just trying to get attention for the real issue, which is that's trafficking and you're just a narcissist. Oh my gosh, They totally put you on like the Shade room. I think that's what I heard about it. Yes. I was sitting here like because I'm not. I got into TikTok during COVID and when I realized that I spent night 9 hours straight on it, I was like OK me and TikTok need to have. A long distance relationship so I post for my business, but I do remember that's how I heard about the story.

22:23 They used some of your clips on the Shade room and I want to say TMZ. It may have been the Shade Room my. Following should be better if I was on TMZ, but I yeah it just came to me. I just thought like this. It's just a little picture of if that is. True, sorry, but yeah, but that kind of what prompted me into like, learning more about this. Like what? Because I I knew this was an important topic. I had been had interest in it before but that kind of pumped me into like kind of deep diving and I actually partnered with this this this nonprofit called Polaris Project.

23:06 They have great education resources. They did a whole episode using their resources for my podcast. So the horror Stories and I really just I got a little like certification from them. So I. You know, I'm kind of like certified sex trafficking, human trafficking educator. That is fantastic. That's so crazy as Oh my gosh, I'm gonna have to try to find it the Shade Room story about it and send it to you. But if you recall that. But yeah, it was a total accident. It was. It was it was random. But I'm I'm happy to shed more light on because it's, I mean, number one, she was on the Dr. Phil show back in the day.

23:47 That she is a compulsive light. She is a huge problem. But then it also highlighted that there's these people that can literally use whatever because they have a platform. Yep. Just to get attention for themselves. Yeah, And so I wanted to like, be like, no, bitch like you're. That's not what they're nervous. Rather than shedding light on yourself, you could be shedding light on an actual on the Yes. Yes, I'm poor Black chyno. She's had a rough she don't take it all her fillers and her her her butt fillers and move their boobs down and she's now Angela White.

24:26 She's not a lot, you know. You said no, not the porn star Angela Blac Chyna. Angela White is the porn star I know, and Blac Chyna's real name is Angela White. She says to go Blac Chyna. Because it's going to make you think of the fourth star. It is. Really. Angela White just did this thing. I'm thinking I'll show you a porn star. We can have Isn't hers the most successful? Only fans? Black China she was. So it said that the rumor was she made 200,000,000 and she's since come out since she's in this awakening and the change of who she is and she's like, I've only made about 2,000,000.

25:09 So she allowed that to be out there for a while. But she's come out and she's like, no, I've I've only made 2,000,000. Now that could also be good PR That's telling her, hey, if you want to change your image, let's go ahead and backtrack a little bit off of what you made. But once again, I give it to her. I mean, look, Tyga to Rob Kardashian. I get it. White poor thing poor thing. And fat Rob too. Not even cute Rob like fat. I give up. I'm nobody cares about a male Kardashian. Like, yeah, my socks didn't work.

25:55 Oh well. So I I have to say that I am very inspired by, I'll say this, I pursued my entrepreneurship and what I do based on telling a a story and being transparent and just being me. Your story and your journey is so much more powerful and you're just you have a lot to share. And I want to thank you for even being open enough to share, you know, with with us and our listeners. You know about your HIV status and you know if magic magic can do it, then we all can. So. Here's the thing. Science is magic.

26:48 Yeah, no, it is. It is. It is. Even though some people go, I don't believe in science. I'm like. So you don't believe it? Truth. Reality is stranger than fix it than fix it right. I fully stand in that. In that belief, it's. You know, as much as as fantasy that some people can really live in, that what we actually live in is way weirder than anything I can ever protect. Nobody could write this, OK? Spielberg, James Cameron, Indian. Nobody could write what we live every single day. Cameron. What did I say?

27:23 Cameron Oh my God, I love how you can hear, but you can't hear me when I'm just talking to you. But you can hear my little slip ups. Headphones, they good. They amplify. This is being married. This is being married, guys. So one last thing I know when I said I had two questions, I didn't forget. Marijuana doesn't make you forget, you know. Oh, it does mean it. My brain drews the mush. I come back to stuff and he goes, how do you remember that? And I'm like, it's talent. But I love to ask because there's this huge People use kink and fetish interchangeably, and they do have different definitions and they do mean different things.

28:10 How do you define a kink and how do you define fetish? So I would say, I would say fetish is more of a compulsion and that could be anything kind of like off off the beaten path, you know it it could be like. A racial fetish, for example. Or it could be, you know, a fetish for a body part or a fetish for a certain thing.

28:39 Kink is similar. I would say kink has more to do with like finding a community or finding just like kind of a like a facet that you just, I really can't describe it. I'm not. We actually define what a kink is. I love what you're saying because everybody has a different meaning, but it's in overall it. I think it's being used, like I said, interchangeably, right? Where they do meet, but there's different aspects of of what makes each individual. Kink has to do with like more of like a community that centers around a certain sexual thing.

29:27 And like, there's kink communities. That's where my definition kind of kicks in. Fetish is more like a psychological compulsion I think yes. And it's like so we we had a couple of doctors on and one said you know a fetish is you can't come to completion without involving that maybe foot fetish or something like that. So it is definitely more mental, definitely like you said, it's more of a compulsion in that aspect because you can't find yourself come to completion or is kink. You can't like you it.

30:02 You like for it to be involved, but it doesn't have to be in order for you to reach satisfaction. Right. Like for instance, I think swinging that's a key swinging. Because there's a community aspect to it and it's just something that you're into. You can't really have a swinging fetish? Exactly, yeah. Yeah, no, that's right. That's great example because swinging is a community they have, we have our own lingo, you know, Pineapples don't mean we, we love dole, you know? I love pineapples too, but yeah, that's why you hear of.

30:43 That always cracks me up when I say that I was like, really? The pineapples? OK, yes. And it's so funny because I'm finding that people are even going on cruises and being very open about it. And we went on a cruise with family at the end of 2019 and we were like, damn, we did see a couple of doors with that pineapple on it. Like, we even know our community was there. I need to know that the origin. I know I've looked it up too. And because we've done episodes on the lingo and the ins and outs and the do's and don'ts and things, and I don't think we've ever come across the origin of the pineapple because.

31:21 There was also. Palm trees, Flamingos. Flamingos, Flamingos. Yeah. Flamingos means something different but. Basically everyone in Palm Springs then, and yay. Came from Florida in. Florida, There is a large community of those who would either live or retire in Palm Springs. Let me just tell you. Look, they if people want to say sex stops at 60s or 70, no it. Does not. In Palm Springs, we met a lady at the resort that we are members of, she said She spent her 75th birthday at the resort, 3 days on her back.

32:02 Just have an orgy. Just getting and just getting ran through. I was like, wait, say that again. For three days. I got time for that. Three days she. That's look at 75, you do.

32:19 And she was throwing that attitude like we were like, I've never seen an old lady throw it before. Like she was just throwing it at this dude following around and shit. The right I was like, I'm going to be. He was 75. I don't know, getting ran through for three days, but maybe having a three day celebration, that sounds fun. I'm getting ran through, you know, 75. You've lived a long, long time, so you may deserve getting ran through. You may have earned it you know. But yeah that was a our mind was blown.

32:52 Let's just say the rest of that weekend.

32:57 Well, I could speak to you forever and ever in a day but Mr. Producer here has already given me a time check twice. So I do want to ask something that we ask at the in the every episode what would be your mic drop so you have the time to share any little like a nugget of inspiration knowledge just to your Kanye mic drop. Go ahead and say some shit to people. Go.

33:32 Or I would say explore your deviant side, but do so safely. I love it. That belongs to the tshirt. That's tshirt worthy. So one last thing, let everybody know when they can reach out to you if they have any questions, If they would like to maybe work with you. If they would like to share a hook up Horror Story, where would everybody reach out and touch you? Follow the podcast, Hook up Horror stories. There is a link in most of the episode description, the most recent show descriptions, where you can actually submit a story anonymously.

34:11 So I have a little Google form you can fill out. I'll. Read it on the podcast and I'll also do a little write up on it for Instagram and and then of course my website demetriwilde.com. You'll find all of that my blogs. You'll find the podcast there too. You'll find the shop so you can pick up that Stormy Daniels shirt, yes? And my my poetry books are on Amazon. That is fantastic. We will talk a little more offline because we're going to start another podcast where we are doing, it's like a storytelling time.

34:46 So you remember like the old PBS shows where the guy would sit and what's it called Shake, not Shakespeare Theater.

34:56 They were just like read old books or. Shakespeare Theater. That's what it's called. Are you sure? That's where they were, read stories, and then they would show little clips on the maximum amount on PBS. Guess I was right, but all down and dirty sexual shit. I'd love to talk to you a little about the self-publishing that you did and about your poetry, but we'll do that offline, because if not, it'll be a whole another hour of an episode. So you guys please support. You want to subscribe. You want to like you want to share do it all for Demi.

35:35 It's great individual, lot of, like I said, of, of love and compassion and just caring about other people, which we need more of. We don't care enough about others and we start to do that. This will be a much more pleasant world and the aliens will look down on us and go maybe they're getting it. Maybe. And then they'll finally see us, right? It's right, those living among us and elsewhere. So I want to thank you once again so much for your time. It's been a pleasure, you guys know. Love, always love, light, good sex, All the other nasty shit that I normally say.

36:20 See y'all next time. Thank you for joining us on Soulmates and Swingers. We hope that you enjoyed yourself just as much as we did. Please don't miss our next. Play date. It just wouldn't be the same without you. Until my son, be passionate, be in the moment, be bowl, be loving. Be the best version of me love at night. Hey, this is Mondo. Thanks for joining us this week. We want soulmates and swingers. If you have any questions or any topics that you want us to cover, you can reach us at 12IN. NSATIV [email protected] and also on Twitter AT12IN NSATIVA make sure you like, follow, subscribe, comment, hit all the buttons you can except for the delete button and we'll see you next.